Sunday, February 19, 2012
RIP Fo.Kley's: I'm a Sentimentalist, I like to be Reminded.
I lost them on the same side of the Pacific Ocean as I bought them, though, they have been to 3 different contents since I've got them.
They were with me from Notre Dame, to a certain corporate coffee shop. From Busan, to codes on 3...to Brisbane. They meant a lot to me, but, so does doing really well in school which starts next week. They helped me learn my priorities, my principles.
- have fun
- deliver the best
- do the right thing
- take ownership
- know what time it is
- keep focused
...know what time it is. It is not time for a code on 3, it is time for school-ing; to deal with code on 3.
Today, I bought a new pair of sunglasses which will hopefully never see me be exhausted after codes. They never see me write personal statements, or, take a ten-minute break from said corporate coffee shop, as the ones before them did.
These lenses will watch me quit smoking.
These sunglasses will likely be part of my motorcycle helmet too...they will be with me as I'm exhausted from school. They will likely get taken out by a wave one day at the Gold Cost - just like the last pair. They'll be with me as I consider the idea of a PhD - and a half-a-mil in debt.
They are (at the end of the day), an inanimate object. They are just sentiment to those codes on 3, those bikes, those kiddos on 2, or those arcane objectives I had to get to this point in my life.
Things are just things, and, money is just money (McConnell, S., 2009).
My motorcycle key still rests on my backpack from when I rode it. I still have the Red Sox hat Lexi bought me from 2008. My board shorts that Kendall sat on still are in my possession. The things I have through this journey remind me of where I am, and, what I needed to do to get here.
Here (read: MA in Counselling - fucking finally).
There is nothing better than running codes in a Vetnamese necklace. Or, walking around Australia with a camera that took a picture of Stonehenge and the Colosseum in Rome once. There is nothing better than a victory dance; even if it means raising a beer to a pair of sunglasses.
There's nothing better than having beers in Australia, in a pair of scrubs I got in Austin.
It reminds me of where I came from:
- "code gray - 3rd floor PICU."
- 5 shot, 3 pump, soy chai with no-foam?
- "ego, teacher, ego?"
Scrubs, hats, coffee mugs, (et., .al) in Brizzy will remind me of that life / buddies I left in Austin or Mokpo. They will remind me of what I did to earn those pictures I've taken, those beers i had, those cigs I used to smoke, and those times I was done with working towards Brizzy.
Cheers to work finally, working, for me. Cheers to next week - lets do this! Let me adapt the same way I did in Europe, in Asia, and finally, in Australia. Cheers to those sunglasses I'll never see again. To scrubs, to coffee mugs I bought after meeting Coach K. To that lighter after that kid told me they listened to me, or, that hat I'm wearing right now.
Cheers to life - cheers to 'what is next.'
Live High ya'll.
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Plans
I live in a very accessible city, trains and buses are everywhere. My apartment is right next to a train station, but apparently its only if I’m going downtown. I can hear the rumbling from the train outside my room it until it stops running at midnight. Its kind of a weird comforting sound - like there's always something going on.
A plan that nothing to do with Korea, with Seton, with Florida State, and all the schools that told me I wasn't good enough to do what I did everyday at the hospital.
I cannot wait to start school, to prove those Bobcat, Cougar, & Seminole's (et. al) wrong.
Live High ya'll.
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Why I Work: A few Colored Pencils from Randalls
There’s a beer to my right, a victory cigar to my left, and, my bare feet rest ontop of the railing over looking the pacific. Mumford and Sons is interrupted every once in a while by the crashing waves of the pacific ocean. My computer is charged, my Visa is valid, my flight is good, and my apartment in Austin / Brisbane are paid for.
Life is good.
Work is good.
I’m glad those are two different sentences.
Work is very, very, good. Work got me here:
Work was a bit of a pain-in-the-ass to be honest, it wasn’t easy getting here. I think that’s why I chose Laguna for a ‘victory-dance’ over this whole thing.
Speaking of work, there was a kiddo once who was the epitome-of-depressed, and, I decided that I will find a way to make her smile – that was my only goal that day. After an epic-battle of ‘questions’ (which she totally won), I stepped back and realized what her laughter really meant. I realized why I left Korea, and, the bad-assery of that job.
I realised, what Ann (boss lady) really meant when I left report for the last time...
(Me): “teach a man to fish,”
(Ann): “…exactly.”
I drink to you Yosuf.
I realised what I define as real-success. Not the beaches in Nam or Laguna, the beers in Moes or at Baby Blues. Its not the cars or bikes I drive, the hotels I have, or, the type of sunglasses I have. Hell, its not even about that crap-paycheck from the hospital for that matter. Its about what I want, where I want to go, and what I want to do for these kiddos.
Even if success is as simple as ‘questions.’
Game of Questions: literally, passing a ball back-and-forth between people and only asking questions. You cannot answer, if you do, you lose. Kiddos loved it.
To me defining success was not by the material objects, xbox's, trips to laguna, motorcycles, or skydiving trips…it was simple stuff that we did, that added up, to a successful ride through a psyche hospital. Even if its as simple as working for the patient, not, working for the hospital. As simple as a few colored pencils from Randalls, a bar of soap, or a number off a cell phone. Its as simple, to me, as a smile for the epitome-of-depressed kid.
All the while, mind you, working to get to a graduate degree at a school in Australia – but, not getting paid for it. Working, 77 hours one week at a mental hospital, and, finding an apartment in a different continent (everything.involved.with.uq., et. al).
Her smile was well worth those 77 hours.
This whole Laguna trip was expensive, and, well worth every dollar. It reminded me of why I'm going to school, got me in the right-mindset to leave the country (again), and I think I just needed a sense of peace with it all. A sense of peace, a confident-mind, a feeling that "everything is gonna to be alright." I think, I needed, what this monk has:
Right, so, what’s next?
Laguna Beach for 2 days, a 13 hour flight to Auckland, New Zealand…then a 3 hour flight to Brisbane. These 2 days have been exactly what I wanted them to be. I got in on Sunday around 3, took those pictures, then met the local Laguna crowd. Not as, Laguna-ey (read: douchey), as I thought they would be – MTV must have photo-shopped that high school in.
…not that I’ve ever seen that show, or, anything.
I’m ready to start school, I’m anxious for this flight. I’m excited and nervous, I’ve got what I call “skydive legs," where I can feel my heart-beating in the soles of my feet. Its time to do this already! I feel like I’ve been standing in the tunnel to run out on the field, in my own Super Bowl I call a graduate degree. Bah, lets do this!
What’s next, already!?!
I start school on the 3rd of March, and Orientation begins on Feb. 20th. I wanted a month in Brisbane, I decided on one more week at work and only 3 weeks before it all starts – it was worth it. I’m gonna miss that job. And that week payed for this hotel.
I’ve got 4 hours to kill, I just want the damn ball already!
Live high, ya’ll.